Diary: July 23

First day of this month ended with a tomfoolery party at the Tushilaw Inn, a pub "cook" representing an invading socialist society enquired if I was OK whilst sporting "Nothing but Love" t-shirt; encored drone of "Let it be" n "Auld Lang Syne"; spite sponged vinegar upon weary, estranged soul, parched of life.

30th

Some sheep at the paddock have maggots attacking their bottoms, so today I've been shooting the fly spray squirt gun. The sheep have blue lines down their backs, and a spot on their heads, Charlie said rain will wash the thick blue liquid into their fleeces and protect the flock from fly strike.

We baited ewes and their lambs with ewe pellets, into a broader pen, before separating them into a smaller pen. We close the flock in tighter, for short periods of time to prevent the sheep from jumping over the pen hurdles.

We were left with six tups lambs and three ewe lambs, we let the mother ewes go, after we had sprayed them. Once loaded into the trailer, they seemed calm but wondrous as to where they were being transported to. The violet on them is supposed to be applied onto their hooves, but Charlie sometimes uses it to mark them.

We may have old farm equiptment, but we make the best of what we have, and our sheep are cared for, we look after their welfare.

At our second grass keep, near Bowden, we rounded up six tups and transported them to the farmhouse paddock for holding; until we transport them to auction on tuesday. There has been an excess of tup lambs this year, leaving a mere several ewe lambs we want to keep.

Took ages to get them to leave the trailer, I presumed they jump out, but Charlie had to coax them out from inbetweem the wooden slats.

The boys hang out together, the new six tups seem alright with the paddock; when they left the paddock for grass keep they were only wee lambs. I am amazed at how quickly the dock leaves have returned, I plan to fence off areas of the paddock, and spray weed killer.

Half of our kitchen garden was eaten by rabbits and birds. We sealled the perimeter with posts and wire but was to busy to continue the work. Overtaken by weeds the french dwarf beans, swede, carrots and onions have been completely eaten; although we expect a good crop of potatoes this year.

Charlie was upset we missed cream teas at Roberton this month, replying I stated, if they had talked to us a bit more, instead of us being invisible, we would have remembered, with the "social" event being more significant. Passing by, covered in sheep poo we noticed an electric bike event advertised; wondering if its the same people I met last September in Golspie.

Unbelievable the maggot infested sheep we witnessed today at the beginning of the Roberton to Ashkirk road; turned my stomach. This is what happens when you don't check your sheep, dag and spray them, maggots eat them alive from the anus, appalling to see this so near to Roberton.

29th

We had planned to go to the Border Union Show today, but visited the Scottish Borders village of Yetham, then crossed over border to the English / Northumbrian town of Wooler.

Saw this sign but with some bemusement know, safari park rules [wind up your windows, don't stop] apply only within cities subjected to the law of the jungle, i.e London and Leicester.

We enjoyed roadside views whilst travelling via Otterburn to Kielder castle.

We returned to the A68 via a woodland road, the longest forest drive in the UK; after as few miles we found the "Nick". I enjoyed the time here, in this stunning location; this wooden sculpture I found interesting.

Charlie seemed to be mythed by how much sand was at this location.

We returned to Scotland via Carter Bar, then turned left away from Jedburgh and towards Hawick, passing through Bonniebridge.

27th

Today I have been editing an exposure about Cambodia. Few people know that genocidal mass murderers, the Khmer Rouge (the name King Norodom Sihanouk gave to his communist "opponents" in the 1960s), known as Communist Party of Kampuchea and established as the Democratic Kampuchea, self-described as "a new and better society, democratic, egalitarian and just"; believed that "men and women are equal in every respect" and were "ideological commitment to radical equality". Ho Hum.

Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge, most of whom were French-educated communists, took the concept of "Year One" in the French Revolutionary Calendar. The French "Year One" came about during the French Revolution when, after the abolition of the French monarchy on 20 September 1792, the National Convention instituted a new calendar and declared that date to be the beginning of Year I. Does this not echo "the Great Reset" of the globalist World Economic Forum and the coming Marxist-Leninist technocratic 4th Industrial Revolution?

25th

Early morning we travelled to Longtown (nr Carlisle), and dropped off eleven store lambs at the cattle market auction. This was the first time we were here in a decent 4x4 and not the barn on wheels, which I believe had become notorious, difficult to tell, because in this day and age, few comments, notably negative comments are spoken to one's face. But this cattle market is different, the vibe is positive, among lively people, enamoured and emboldened from the results of their endeavours, both successful and unsuccessful. The spirit of the land, in memory of our ancestors, resonates stronger with the life of agriculture.

In the afternoon, Charlie had a visit from his landlord, whilst I focussed my attentions on eradicating [with strimmer and weed killer] dock leaves from the farmhouse paddock. As the strimmer liquidated huge dock leaves gathered around manure piles, I wondered about my father, perhaps he had hated dock leaves because of the Integra Natura, a question beckoned: had the scumbag cult taken my father away from me? My father never returned, the cult seeming to curse anybody from "going back". I remembered the time when he had tried to enrol us into a catholic primary school named Saint Winifred [Welsh Saint]. Admission refused, mother stated the reason was because they didn't like my father.

23rd

Today we cancelled going to the Braemar Highland games, went I found the royal family attending it curdled my state of being with turmoil sickness. After tending to sheep at both grass keeps, Charlie penned and sheared the last remaining Teeswater ewe during a downpour of sopping rain. I remained in the warm car, observing.

Returning to Hawick, we parked up at Walton Park to listen to Hawick Pipe band. The band played unabated by the poor weather, and three gazebos were erected for attendees, dampness was affecting the bag pipe reeds, but I enjoyed the music.

Today my mind is noisy, but I'm not listening.

22nd

This morning I took some flower pictures of the farmhouse garden, the area feels much healthier now most of the dock leaves have been removed. This simple farmhouse garden has lifted my mood more than type words can describe; if it were not for the ascetic of this world, I'd be dead from suicide, but that's what the depravity beasts want.

Some months ago we visited a wool studio in Berwick on Tweed, Charlie had promised a couple of fleeces to the proprietor, today we delivered them. I got Charlie to stop the car, enabling me to take a picture of a field of blue flowers.

And the fake house, with painted windows, strange, why do this? for what purpose?

We also visited, for a few minutes, Union Chain Bridge near Paxton House.

Via Berwick, we stopped at Kelso, Charlie purchased me a new yellow and red floral dress in Fat Face and a ceramic rolling pin at a charity shop. This is the first time I've purchased a size 18 dress, after continuing to purchase 16's on deluded presumption that somehow I'd lose weight. I don't eat much, and I am active, so I am suspecting the gain is due to a medical problem.

Felt clarity to face the choppy coast at Spital, whilst enjoying an ice cream; many people enjoy this serene space, but I've never witnessed this place overcrowded. Not in a hurry we drove to Coldstream via Etal, and stopped to view the castle; I'd been here in Etal, at this very castle before, a couple of years ago.

Before returning to Hawick, we stopped for a drink at the Auld Cross Keys pub in Denholm. Here we were visited by a stocky Martinist wearing a Los Angeles "RAIDERS" top, (they usually make a return visit whenever I write about their logos intrusions) his glance seem fixated upon us, but without being incoherent to his surroundings. I was sure I'd seen him some place before, some years ago at the height of stalking contentions; remembering him to be a monster. He seated himself with his partner and thus attentions focussed elsewhere.

20th

We collected a friend from her flat in Hawick then drove down the A7 towards Langholm. Before Langholm there is a roadside cafe I've thought about entering, this time we parked and ordered some breakfast. Charlie wished he had ordered what was on my plate, a sausage and egg sandwich. We were followed into the cafe, by a Martinist, everybody wears logo's and so unwittingly becomes part of the game, atleast as a masqurade, but this guys reactions fitted our spectulations; even our friend noticed him.

Today we returned to the auction mart in Carlisle, Charlie was interested to see a Thai dancing idol go under the hammer. The lot made over £700 which I thought expensive, but Charlie figured the lot could easily have made anything between £1200 and £5000 on a different day. Many items at auction appeared to be junk, I was surprised how much people will pay, what use is it other than to be used, say, for a film prop. We watched a stone manger auctioned for almost £5000!

We also visited a garden centre, and purchased more weed killer, most if not all doc leaves have been eradicated from the farmhouse grounds. We would have drop sprayed the paddock, if there had not been ewes and lambs grazing.

Returning back to the Scottish Border via Langholm we stopped at a collectables shop, where Charlie purchased me mounted antlers to hang on my flat wall. We finished the evening at the farmhouse, I could help gazing at Charlies frogs in his pond before retiring the evening in front of a roaring wood / coal fire.

19th

Returning from the Selkirk to the farmhouse, as we drove up the steep incline of our driveway both, Charlie and I overheard a hundred or so lambs weaning, distant upon the western hillside. In the duration of the decade Charlie has lived here, he never heard lambs weaning, until this very night.

18th

This website had short duration of downtime this morning as I re-imaged this hosting server, processes running much faster now, and the old legacy website; this website was re-written from, is now erased.

"Because I can value memories of my mother's well being into the present, sidestepping an ignorant family members ignoring me hapless unto the contempt of a beligerent aposolate, who'd despise my existance into an ostracised oblivion."

Today I purchased a dashcam for our 4x4; everything we now see and more, will be recorded from our car. All these years nobody confirmed to me what was happening, not one person; whilst I was traumatised blind.

17th

Beyond a facade of peace, they is a psychological war, depriving you of everything you're in this world to be.

16th

This morning we administered double the dose of antibiotic into the flock, as they are too slow to heal from their eye infection. Some have gone blind, but Charlie has said this is temporary, I want this cruel infection stamped out. Midday we off loaded a duff hover to household refuse dump, then drove out of Hawick to Smailholm tower.

We drove back through Earlston, and was followed, by twisted Martinists into the Cooperative supermarket; I utterly detest their encroachment. In the evening we enjoyed a traditional Sunday roast at the farmhouse before returning to Hawick. Charlie shortened the pendulum on my mantle clock after this clock lost twenty-one minutes in just six days.

15th

Friend visited this morning, happy to know she is successfully settling into the Scottish Borders. In the after we visited both grasskeeps, then Melrose, as we drove by St Boswells we noticed a Gypsy fair there on the village green.

Large police presence, why?

Tonight I am at the farmhouse, editing this here website; behind me is a roaring open fire.

14th

At my flat all today, coding this website.

13th

Started the pendulum on my mantle clock today; the clock is now running after an oiling of the mechanism with 3 in 1 house oil. Last night, I took my new [used] singer sewing machine (made in Scotland between 1958 and mid 1963) to my flat. I plan to make curtains for the farmhouse, then summer dresses; and also some repairs to Charlie's clothing, should he require the help. It's a bright sunny morning today, the sheep will be happier and healthier, as I endeavour to write and code this here website.

Slept through most of the today, and I'm feeling unwell; I believe heavy vibrations from the grass strimmer are having a detrimental effect on the health of my body. Whilst using the strimmer my thoughts lull, after use, about two hours later I develop a headache and sleep for hours and hours. Nothing alleviates or overwrites the voices relaying spiteful messages, not blindness of dissociation or even serve persistences of Tinnitus I endure.

12th

Cleaned the farmhouse, the hover kept clogging up with brown dust; I am suspecting this to be one of the causes of Charlie's lung problems. Cleaning out the hoovers air filters, I noticed the dust reducing. I focused my attentions on ridding the living room of cardboard boxes, Charlie came home from work and remarked how nice the room looked without them. The rain poured down as I altercate between gardening and housework; the setting was peaceful, but my mind was noisy. I suffer a running commentary of negative messages, began a decade ago, after suffering much trauma whilst displaced as homeless. Today I am helping Charlie with his home, it's easy to stagnate, when dissociative, alone. This deprivation and disparity of ostracising alienation we endure, for "them" whilst they hate us hapless; not penance but evil, turning our distinction, through fear, loathing and evil, into an extinction.

Charlie finished work late, as we began to gather ourselves to pen the flock, rain poured down over the paddock. I call our two cade lambs, they came, followed as half of the flock, the rest, all but three, Charlie had baited the others in with ewe nuts. We needed to get the Zwartble ewe into the pen, being the source of the eye infection. As the rain poured down, the ewe became confused between the direction of her three lambs and the gate (which led to her lambs) we were trying to get her to walk through. I slipped and slide on the paddocks steep incline, as we drew the Zartble ewe to the gate I grabbed her and pulled her back, escaping my grasp Charlie led her away as I closed the paddock gate. The remaining sheep, a tup and ewe we left, as we figured after time out, they would come to us. We use the rain to get the sheep to go into the poly tunnel, out of the wet, willingly, they are easy to pen here.

We are using a white antibiotic, the ewes are injected with 3 mm whilst the lambs get 1 mm each. Charlie held the lambs whilst I filled the syringe, we marked each of the sheep with red paint after they had received their injection. Our cade lamb, who I've named Donna thrashed hard to be freed, a fighter, like me, I thought. As time pressed on the other sheep resisted less, completing the job before exiting, we opened the pen and exited, leaving the flock to shelter in the poly tunnel.