Diary: April 24
Continued 2/2
6th
Woken up in my flat, no nusiance from the adult baby neighbour; perhaps her pale crumpled body has given up, malnourished to death. Farmhouse is undergoing a deep clean, evasively mystifying how the household dust and dirt creeps upon tables, chairs, sideboards etc, in view of being shattered senseless from day and nighttime lambing.
Happy to see the cade lamb leave the farmhouse, our dining room stunk of haylage, urine and poo. I've swept, scrubbed down and bleach mopped the room three times to rid the room of nasty whiffs. The remaining cades are full of haylage, good news for us as they'll be weaned and ready for grasskeep soon enough.
4th
Editing exposure pages; misery invoking auditory hallucination from derealisation [inflicted by trauma] was severe from waking unto the entire duration of the morning, never positive, always negative and manifesting distraught feelings of perpetual failure. Detachment symtoms from being trauma flayed soulless, disembodied from my people as if I never existed.
Charlie collected me in the afternoon, our first destination was to Denholm to check the welfare of a "sleepy" lamb. The lamb was flustered due to extremity of weather, but still standing and occassionally aligning with the flock so we departed without her.
Our second visit was our grasskeep near Selkirk, both ewes and lambs were well; we used this grasskeep last year, but with the addition of Bothendean, of which we didn't bid for this year. I am glad to not be passing through Bowden every few days, the sleepy village felt cursed, against this here disposition.
2nd
Woken very early, Charlie bottle-fed the cade lambs whilst I laid in bed; we travelled to Longtown and again experienced reckless overtaking from two cars passing us near the Scottish / English border. I have reminded Charlie to keep the dashcam plugged in, I'm planning to make a overtaking compilation and sending this dangerous driving video to the police; as I believe the causation of this to be chased down, leave behind, targeted harassment. The big breakfasts at Longtown are becoming boring, I don't enjoy visiting there as I did before; future visits will be a quick in and out; I can't forget the café scolding me and Charlie for two wasted breakfasts left behind on our table by some really mean people, if it happened at all.
Animals always appear in my photographs, because twisted cultural Marxists can't brainwash animals absent, ostracising people as inherently evil. Attempting to vocally dissolve this milieu control, terrorises until anxiety prohibits speaking. Limited capacity supports applied consensus to manifest an illusion of informed consent, nobody cares about our souls being taken away as if what we are never belonged to us; everything we were to each other intercepted and interloped. A pathocracy that despises white ethnicity lifeless, demolishing ethnocentric and homogenous sanctities to reap perceived multicultural beneifts from obstruction and malformation of virtue; where longevity of the prevailing liar is revered as godly.
The fleece falling from the ewes neck is from her pushing into the ring feeder, and not from scab which starts on the neck.
They didn't know they were going to a large field of fresh grass, but nonetheless entered the trailer without much encouragement.
The age and mileage of our 20 year old truck is concerning when smoking whilst towing, but we've had few mechanical problems since we purchased this time last year.
We took two ewe and two lambs, we received £250, Charlie said they didn't sell very well, but the auction was quick; noticing a recently displayed no photography poster, I was glad to leave. We talked about other livestock auctions, with the idea of selling at Lockerbie, but cognitive dissonance, a nowhere slipstream along these freedom country roads, seems to track, follow and erase us, as I've rarely if ever experienced such discordance anywhere other than on returning second visit. After loading more ewes and lambs we drove to our grass keep near Selkirk, along the way Jock's ewes and lambs glared halted unto the oncoming direction of our truck. I also witnessed a failed lamb being torn apart by two seagulls.
Unloading these ewes and lambs was a breeze compared to the awkward ewes and lambs we took to Longtown. Watching the lambs wonder at the expanse of green grass, and the ewes enjoying fresh grass from five months' diet of haylage, ewe nuts and chaff is truly something. We were eager to get these sheep out of the polytunnel, chancing mild weather, as the flock is much healthier out in the field. We now have to be watchful for springtime scold, otherwise known as strawberry foot. We successfully treated with an easy and effecting application of violet spray. Lambs, ewes at grass keep near Selkirk will have to be treated three weeks from today for fluke worm; parasite killed three lambs last year on this paddock.
Leaving the farm I was able to forlay Charlie loading more ewes and lambs to grassheep, tiredness both overhanging, and looming upon his face concerned me. We enjoyed a quiet evening before Charlie returned to the farmhouse to feed a poorly cade lamb, who is late weaning onto grass and pellets. We know there are cultural marxists conspiring to destroy us in the Scottish Borders; exploiting vulnerablities in attempt to predispostion our lives into intollerable, poverty stricten suffering; yet sleep well, endeavouring not to work too hard.