Diary: April 24

We have almost finished lambing and are now moving mother ewes with their lambs onto grasskeeps.

29th

There are updates to be done to this dairy and also exposure pages contained within this website. It's a cold grey morning here in the Scottish Borders, I have an open log fire glowing behind me whilst I type this paragraph, the farmhouse is quiet, but my mind is dissociated thought noisy from years of trauma inflicted derealisation.

I feel happy when Charlie is contented, experiencing genuine emotions was hazed by stormy emotional Borderline Personality Disorder. I am working to calm this disturbed mind to rest well with my physicality before I die; I don't want to take damage inflicted onto me where I am going. The room I am pictured in is one of two rooms that have yet to be decorated.

Charlie return home from a ten hour work day, and then struggled for one and half hours to bring the flock from the paddock into the poly tunnel, severe rain has been harsh on our lambs.

Licking wounds scab suckers feed from is scorned, but this is what it is, theft of reality to debase, detach and interlope reality as though those who are real, never existed. But there is hope, because what is good for the goose is good for the gander. One calm day retribution will arrive, and we certainly won't be repositioned as scapegoats to receive it. I cooked Charlie fish, chips and mushy peas; he enjoys eating my food and I get satisfaction from seeing a hungry man full.

28th

Charlie got the tractor working after charging the battery, a trespassing intruder had come onto the farm and turned on the tractor ignition key on; Charlie is meticulous about things and noticed other mechanisms on this tractor were also interfered with. He attached the muck spreader and began ascent up the paddock embankment without further issues, after this muck spreader had been parked stationary for two years. Our friend surmised the wheels being ceased up, but Charlie had oiled the machine before putting the machine to rest.

During the early hours of the morning and later in the afternoon, I help our friend fix his broken computers. His laptop had a Linux OS upgrade, from Ubuntu Mate to Fedora, I also upscaled the hard drive to SSD, a change that sped up the laptop significantly. After replacing the hard drive, I found the laptop locked with a BIOS password, this was cracked by finding a BIOS password generator online and entering a system ID code. Our friend fixed his desktop after finding the power switch defective, I happily plied our guest with cups of tea.

As dusk settled upon the Northern side of Borthwick Valley, we endeavoured to fix a CCTV camera to protect our yard. We've used an IPCam from the farm's poly tunnel as lambing has finished for our ewes. Charlie used a ladder to mount the CCTV onto a wood located underneath the roof gutter, this has allowed us a monitored 320 degree view of the farmhouse yard. Charlie said these scumbags usually burgle farmhouses to steal quad motorbikes; to burgle the livelihood of a hard-working farmer, and inevitably starve their livestock of food.

27th

Two badgers terrified our lambs early this morning, they're nothing to the monsters who frightened their encroachments into depriving me of life, but I checked on the welfare of these wee things anyhow, and they're OK this morning. I am nagging Charlie to erect the extra CCTV camera; I am going to email trespassing video clips directly to the police force. Early afternoon we drove to Denholm and then to Selkirk, at Denholm we hoof clipped and sprayed a lame sheep with violet. At Selkirk we rounded up the flock inside a run and wormed them for fluke parasite, Charlie also dagged four ewes with mucky bums; the hard stone in the run hurt his knees considerably, notably when a ewe kicked out at him.

On the way to Selkirk we noticed our front right tire was flat, Charlie pulled in a mile from Minto and pumped the tire up. Today I restrung my banjo, I've missed playing for five days, forlaying purchasing new strings; however this time I ordered two sets rather than one. I still have a phobia of numbers, including 27, when I was stalked whilst displaced destitute.

26th

We're placing another CCTV camera alongside the farmhouse as fly by trespass is becoming a regular occurrence. Charlie reckons ladders are the most dangerous item of farm equipment; he says not to go up and fix the camera whilst I am alone but I want the trespassing to stop.

Today I uploaded a video of a royal gardener being stung by CIM peadophile hunters; he talked about prince Andrew slapping his bottom and saying "nice ass", amongst many other things. You can find the video clip on exposure Pimp INC; I am contemplating adding Louis Mountbatten and other close relatives of the British royal family to this exposure page.

24th

Rode my mountain bike to the Craik and back to the farmhouse, visited two friends at their caravan on the edge of the forest. Informing me of an investigative journalist named Dave Starbuck that had researched Ian Huntly and Maxine Carr handed a narration recording of facts concerning the case. I've digitally ripped this CD into MP3 format to download and share.

23rd

Early morning Charlie loaded three ewes and lambs into the trailer bound for Longtown Market. We enjoying a small breakfast before entering the ring to watch our ewes and lambs auctioned at £70-80 a life. Returning through Langholm we took rest at Ewes Water, I wandered and taking pictures of ducks before we departed to refuel our truck.

This afternoon I purchased a new pair of sunglasses, Charlie was shocked at the £100 price tag but that's not much considering my last pair of sunglasses I purchased cost £400. After seeing to the lambs at Selkirk grasskeep we travelled to a garden centre for seeds to grow food in our farmhouse kitchen garden. Along the way a huge oversized pickup truck dangerously overtook us as we were nearing St Boswells.

22nd

Today, after a visit into Hawick, I purchased bordersforum.online domain name. The woman in the wool shop was so rude, looked at me then began gossiping with her friend whilst I waited to purchase an item. I stood there for minutes, whilst they talked about this and that; only when I turned my back and began to walk away did I get "can I help you". I protested the rudeness to which the woman replied she was serving the customer, despite conversation being off-topic and her not visibly purchasing anything. I won't be returning to that establishment again, in the face of such ignorance, it is of no wonder Hawick doesn't have many shops, why potential customers, including myself, fuck that and shop online now.

Donna the cade ewe lamb finally lambed and became a mother ewe today, we don't know the time of birth as the wee black lamb was dry when we found her late afternoon. Most of the ewes and lambs that have not gone to grasskeep have been released onto the farmhouse paddock to graze on fresh grass. The lambs are playful in the open spaces which is some comfort to observe. During the evening I fetched my bridge camera and took close up pictures of the springtime flock. In the evening I broke a banjo string with my new wire cutters whilst I was attempting to trim the ends at the head.

21st

We entertained three friends at the farmhouse.

At dusk, I watched an awesome sunset from the verge of the paddock.

20th

Charlie is still humoured by the lambs reaction from me singing to them; I have a roaring open log fire located behind me whilst I update this website.

Cuteness of these Herdwick / Teeswater lambs that we put out onto the farmhouse paddock yesterday. We've enjoyed the milder weather this afternoon.

19th

Most of the lambs in the polytunnel have now weaned onto haylage. This morning I strimmed away the ending of snowdrops from the farmhouse front garden.

In the evening, noticing the soil had hardened, we released three mother ewes with their lambs onto the farmhouse paddock. We both enjoyed watching the lambs play.

18th

Created a blog with Ghost CMS, where I am focusing on publishing structured, formatted content, rather than a life log of events. The short break from publishing on this website has provided me with some invaluable perspective, in view of editing pages that already exist here, on this website. The Ghost website will always be updated after this website.

I find content management systems restrictive and cumbersome, preferring to code HTML, CSS and PHP by hand; I can't display 360 pictures on ghost and video files are limited to 5mb. Yet I am able to allow subscription and allow subscribers to comment, whilst ghost administrators are diligence of security issues that such an application demands.

17th

Played my banjo; I am enjoying learning how to play this musical instrument.

Now you're just somebody that I used to know..

Whilst Charlie shopped at Morrisons in Hawick I took some pictures of people through the truck window.

16th

My Herdwick ewe lambed male and female twins last night; these wee Teeswater x Herdwick lambs are so cute.

Today Charlie drove to Selkirk to purchase a chain for his saw, the lambs looked well at grass keep. Whilst Charlie fed coos at Denholm, I took a few pictures of birds within the farmyard.

Dreadful reprobates in the town, I am so glad of country life, hasten my move into a village. Far away from cultural Marxist vomit; oh lord, purge and banish multiculturalism, be them gone from taking away my life. Monsters traumatising my people into selflessness, to crawl underneath their flesh and deface them unrecognisable is perhaps the worse targeted racial hatred in the history of the known world.

13th

We're having trouble with one cade lamb that has seriously fallen behind, among other cade lambs he suffered stomach illness (from tainted powdered milk) the worst. We are worried he is going to slip from our grasp and not survive the weaning onto grass, he's taken hours and hours away, but we'll do what we can to keep him alive in this world.

I felt relieved to be away from my flat yesterday; uncomfortable near my hateful neighbours, their minds poisoned with repressive, partisan tolerances. People were in and out of the flat block, arriving at the flat opposite, laughing and smirking observing me leaving; as Cuthaig enablers they believe flaying me lifeless from my people is such a tee he, sneaky fun.

Bird suffered Communism more than any other creature, China, underneath dictator Mao Zedong, exterminated millions of sparrows (and other birds) by terrorising these defenseless birds out of the sky. Obviously Mao's botched collectivisation efforts never knew about permaculture; but nonetheless us British are scapegoat blamed for the orcastrated famine.

It is hard to imagine launching such a sustained attack on these wee feathered creatures, harassing them lifeless from curtailing locusts, preventing biblical insects from ravaging food crops. Did anybody educate these Cuthaig enablers that Mao's botched Cultural Revolution envied and sort to surpass the economic prosperity of Great Britain.

Yet it is this sicko that Cuthaig enablers revere; and their mass murdering "rainbow father" predecessor revered into a religious context; Communist / Marxist mass murderer Rev Jim Jones. In fact, many of his brainwashing techniques are still used today by Cuthaig enablers.

Scapegoating life to extinction is no stranger to Communism, the inability to "Zero" reset Cambodia was unfairly blamed onto people wearing glasses; then what about the mass starvation (caused by artificial scarcity) of Kulak farmers in Ukraine by Leon Trotsky, starving Kulaks pheasants into eating their children; an atrocity that Cuthaig enablers admire.

At least in the farmhouse the abusive and vile associations are not located under the same roof as the flat block building; our immediate neighbours are OK and the Cuthaig enablers in the Borthwick valley are some distance away from the farmhouse. I intend writing a Cuthaig enabler exposure page, explaining who they are and what they do; so people are aware.

The rain relentless poured down, flowing over the window screen of our truck. I was ritually abused with water in association to the Christian rain movement, by Cuthaig enablers, whilst vulnerably displaced and terrorised upon the streets of London. There was also much ritualised emphasis placed on flattening energy drink cans, littering I found appalling.

It is hard to place anything into context without association, and for a while I thought myself going insane. Raging through compartmentalisation corridors of marginalisation with absolute impunity is where it is at for these cretins, masters of manipulation. They despise our ethnicity so much they deny us knowing ourselves through others ancestrally akin to us.

We loaded our two tup lambs and transported them to Selkirk grass keep; leaving the farmhouse, relentless rain poured down. The flock at Selkirk were pleased to see our truck, a couple of lambs looked slightly unwell, we figured this was due to heavy weather recently, but we'll be keeping a watch on them nonetheless. Charlie is suspicious, but I am not.

12th

Observing some very strange people walking, seemingly patrolling, about my flat.

Should never fear these people or any people; their presence will fight or flight control you with anxiety. It's easy to get paranoid, a racing mind, isolated alone creates derealisation issues to cope with lack of stimuli (insanity is detachment) but just because your paranoid, doesn't mean that people are not out to get you; hypervigilance is a defence mechanism.

Weirdo seen today and yesterday clutching his phone, sporting a raincoat and wearing dark sunglasses during overcast, rainy days. Atypical antipsychotics induce photosensitivity.

Including the later weirdo that has been loitering in my flat block stairwell.

11th

We transported ewes and lambs, from the farmhouse to the grasskeep. Some ewes already at grasskeep appeared to want to return to the farmhouse.

Many of the black sheep haven't been sold as they have been good mothers, the mother ewe pictured below raised her lambs without any intervention.

Charlie introduced a Zwartble ewe into the Teeswater herd to increase failing Teeswater ewe milk production.

Called in to the bungalow I am supposed to be moving into tree months ago, to found nothing changed inside. We then visited our other grasskeep.

Charlie called into work, fetched straw and got called in to feed the cattle before returning to Hawick. Waiting I took pictures of a newborn calf, and some peacocks.

How now brown cow.

Calf born not long been born, mother coo was still licking cleansing.

In the evening moi and Charlie entertained a friend named Robert; hosting I cooked a big pot of Panackelty of which we shared. Circumstance prohibited hospitality for many years.

9th

I surmised the prevailing winds drying out land surrounding the farmhouse, but relentless rain returned placing rippling puddles everywhere. We arrived to a near empty cattle market at Longtown, we autioned three ewes and lambs at £70 a life. A huge texel tup and lamb auctioned at £170!

Seated myself next to an abusive bidder, he was cruel to everybody that passed by him. Today we enjoyed a small breakfast and a cup of strong wake up coffee. We met our neighbour farm selling sheep to preserve grass land; everybody seemed alittle dazed by the state of the weather. This afternoon we lost a lamb to scour.

Late afternoon Charlie drove to Gateshead, I had messaged a Facebook Market place seller some hours earlier about the sale of a 5 string banjo. Passing over Carter Bar, we over took a Z3, strangely returning on the A68 we were overtook by a Z4, how uncanny and cranky. I purchased the banjo for £100, and we drove back to Hawick as the sun was setting.

I knew the 140 mile round journey would environmentally trigger auditory hallucinations [my maternal family are geordies; none of whom I know], but I am going to so enjoy learning to play the banjo then additionally writing and composing folk songs about how they never wanted to know; the horrific evil of castigating a family member hapless on mere hearsay.

8th

This morning my mind is raging with auditory hallucinations from derealisation. After turning my attention to feeding cade lambs I reopened the keyboard to add missing parts that I'd left out yesterday. Have a great working keyboard, and additionally the know how to repair if the keyboard breaks or requires additional cleaning.

The Apple iMac keyboard, a second hand Ebay purchase, had arrived dirty with an unexpected tipping space bar; I haven't left any buyer feedback for the seller. I'll use this keyboard to destroy the evil Cult of Marxism. This afternoon I've been relaxing, psychoanalysing peadophile hunting stings whilst editing pages on this website.

7th

We drove to Ashkirk, then to Selkirk grasskeep to do a welfare check on the sheep. Charlie pulled over at Lindean Loch, I went for a walk, cool down from being triggered.

I've visited Lindean Loch last year.

Who knows what the monsters have been doing here since.

We also did a welfare check on the sheep at Denholm.

We collected my electronic screwdriver set and later that evening refurbished an Imac keyboard that I'd purchased a month ago from Ebay. There were many rubber springs and tiny screws; filth upon the keyboard plate, trapped inbetween the keys was disgusting.